Writing this post has been lurking at the back of my mind for quite some time now. Weeks in fact. I have been putting it off for so long, mostly for fear that I wouldn't do myself justice with it. I have an idea in my head of how I want this post to come off as all quirky and creative and oh I just threw this together but it actually has a witty but thought-provoking message behind it. But creative ideas do not appear to be flowing and that just does not seem to be happening for me.
Originally, this post was meant to be a review of this Conscience Clear vegan tanner (which is totally amazing by the way, 10/10, would recommend) but, thinking about tan and being a bronzey bitch, in general, got me thinking, why do I do this tho?
A number of factors spring to mind when I think about this, society, beauty standards, the classic "oh it makes me look more toned" response, but how did lathering on a layer of this brown stuff become the new normal? and on a more personal note, how did it become so important to me?
I sometimes like to pride myself on the fact that I am not the kind of person who needs a full face of makeup on to leave the house. In fact, I rarely ever wear makeup. But I do wear fake tan, I wear it all.the.time. Because quite frankly, without it I lack confidence. And this is not an, oh feel sorry for me and give me compliments post, oh no, this is a what the hell is wrong with me and please tell me I am not alone kind of post. Without this little layer of fake tan, no matter how dark or light it may be, I do not quite feel myself. Is trans-skin tone a thing? Because I think I have that.
When Dublin was hit with a mini heat-wave last weekend, I found myself frantically applying Sally Hansen to my legs two hours before my shift so that I could wear a dress to work. As funny as that mental image is, it is also quite sad. To think that I would so desperately feel the need to transform my legs into two little cheesy puffs, rather than spare myself the time and energy and just go au natural.
While many people turn to make up for a little bit of self-confidence, I turn to fake tan. While I love pale skin on other people, I simply can't stand it on myself. I would rather walk around with a bad fake tan job, looking like a piece of streaky bacon, than don my natural skin tone. Which just brings my attention to how bad this addiction has become - sign me up for that newsletter because I am a fully fledged member of tanorexics anonymous.
Admittedly I am probably going to lather my entire body in some Garnier Summer body lotion straight after writing this. So, in no way am I going to try and convince you to ditch the fake tan all in the name of self-love. Because life is all about doing what makes you happy - and for me, fake tan brings me more happiness than chocolate and puppies (well not quite, but you know what I mean). But maybe it is time to not panic so much if I don't have a fresh layer of tan on and the weather suddenly rises above 15 degrees, and to start embracing my natural skin tone just the odd time, you know, baby steps.
Adele x
